After reading Pastor Paul's blog regarding "The Power of A Story" and going back and forth with Paul via comments, he suggested I blog some thoughts. Seeing as my undergrad degree is in Communication, I figure I have enough background in the subject and how our Christian faith affects communication. Bill Strom (Trinity Western University, Langley B.C.) wrote a book entitled More Than Talk: Communication Studies and the Christian Faith which was used as a text in my undergrad studies. I want to focus on a section of the book labeled "Redemptive Interpersonal Communication."
Redemptive Interpersonal Communication
R.I.C. involves four major areas regarding how we: (1) perceive others, (2) speak with others, (3) deal with conflict, and (4) listen to each other.
1) Gracious Perceiving of Others
- Our first impressions of others go deep and die hard.
- Our first impressions guide future perceptions. (Boy, isn't that true and unfortunate?)
- We are prone to pay attention to the intense, novel, and beautiful.
- We allow negative information about others to outweigh the good (I am guilty as charged, Lord forgive me).
- We see ourselves as responding to our environmet, but see others as choosing to act as they do.
- We take credit for our good behavior and blame our environment for our bad behavior, but do just the opposite for people we dislike. (This is a major problem in the Christian community, the lack of accountability).
2. Gracious Language With Others
- Words can bring healing (Proverbs 12:18)
- Kind words bring life (Prov 15:4)
- The right words bring joy (Prov 15:23)
- Careful words keep one out of trouble (Prov 21:23)
- Apt words are beautiful (Prov 25:11)
- Words can bring help, encourage and comfort (1 Corinthians 14:3)
- Helpful words build up and provide what is needed (Ephesians 4:29)
- Speaking the truth in a loving manner encourages Christ-likeness (Eph 4:15)
Meanwhile, there is a power in Ungracious Language as well
- Thoughtless words wound (Prov 12:18)
- Cruel words crush the spirit (Prov 15:4)
- Gossip separates close friends (Prov 16:28)
- Answering before one listens is unwise (Prov 18:13)
- Insulting and obscene talk are to be ridden of (Colossians 3:8)
- Lying is bad (1 Peter 3:10)
- Slander is to be avoided (James 4:11)
3) Gracious Fighting with Others
- Keep your cool
- Keep short accounts
- Act wisely, not foolishly
- Make understanding your aim
4. Gracious Listening with Each Other
- "Listening isn't passive receiving, it's also heart-and-mind responding with appropriate questions and nonverbal affirmations."
- Listening is fruitless unless we remember what the other person has said.
- 6 types of poor listeners: 1) The Pseudo Listener, 2) The Selective Listener, 3) The Monopolizer, 4) The Fixer, 5) The Ambusher, 6) The Defensive Listener.
So the question is this: How can I, as a follower of Christ, communicate more effectively and Christ-like? God redeems us so why should we not redeem others with our words? I feel we can apply these principles in every aspect of life, including in the church.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Hi! Landed on your blog through Pastor Paul's blog. Anyway, great stuff, it looks like you could actually make this an entire series of blogs, a few posts on each of the main topics that you hit on.
As for your question, in my thinking the one way that we can communicate in a Christ-like way is to not separate the two parts of the Great Commandment. First we must deal with our selves by loving God with all of our heart, mind, soul, and strength. Then we must love others. If we do both of those things in that order I think we will at least be off to a good start :-)
Post a Comment